Wal-Mart Opens Store in Winesburg, Ohio
“We chose Winesburg due to its convenient location, relative lack of competing retail superstores, and the darkly powerful inner lives of its residents,” said Thomas Coughlin, president and CEO of Wal-Mart Stores Division, which oversees more than 2,500 locations nationwide.
[...]
“Target scouted the Winesburg area last year but decided against locating there,” Wall Street Journal retail analyst Julia Faber said. “Their control-group data showed that the town’s residents were filled with a rarely articulated yet palpable anguish that meshed poorly with the exuberant image of the Target Corporation. The bankrupt Montgomery Ward, which closed its Winesburg location late last year, seemed more in tune with Winesburg residents’ somber, conflicted psychological state. Wal-Mart, with its proven track record of leaving economic devastation in its wake, should be a good fit.”
[...]
“If you can bring us a lower price from another store, Wal-Mart will match it,” Willard told a customer. “We won’t be undersold. Yet something tells me there has to be something out there beyond Winesburg. Something besides all this decay and loneliness and broken dreams.”
- Via The Onion.
NOTHING is funnier than obscure humour with the right audience.
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